COLUMN: Our inner strength helps us survive

I HAVE had the pleasure and sometimes, displeasure of meeting some of the most amazing immigrants that will tell you heart wrenching tales of resilience.

And, then again, there are those I have met, that have left a bitter taste in my mouth because of their lack of resilience and because they have succumbed to drowning in self-pity. However, amongst many who have survived, I feel honoured to have met one amazing immigrant!

I met Amit on a Thursday afternoon, while returning my rental car to the rental company. The company was gracious enough to drive me home instead of my catching a cab and that is when life brought me into Amit’s path.

Amit is in his late sixties and later on I found out that he had been in the United States for seven years.

At first glance, I had pegged him as Middle Eastern, but much to my surprise, he told me he was Somalian. When I told him I was from Zimbabwe, I saw the glimmer of excitement in his eyes. To him, meeting an African woman was his greatest joy – he has always found pride in how strong this particular feline species are.

From that moment on, in the slow moving drive of the Atlanta traffic to my apartment, went by so fast!

His story, like that of many Africans, is filled with joy and pain. In 1990, Amit left Somalia when the war was getting worse. He was a fighter pilot, but decided to leave in order to ensure the safety of his seven children and his wife. He moved his family to Egypt, where he began working menial jobs to fend for his family.

Soon he realized, he had to leave his family. In hopes of a better job, he left his family behind in Egypt and began to live and work in Saudi Arabia. With a chuckle, he told me how he would work long, hard hours hoping that if he worked harder, he would find his way to become legal and bring his family over to Saudi Arabia, but although he toiled day and night for nine years, his hopes never came to pass.

While in Saudi Arabia, he began going to Italy during the summer months to work odd jobs. Then in the winter months he would return to Saudi Arabia. He told me how each year would go by and he would yearn to be with his family, but he had to continue working to support them in Egypt.

In 1999, President Bill Clinton came to Egypt and created a program that would help those Somali immigrants living in Egypt find passage into America as refugees. His family took advantage of the program and relocated to Atlanta. He, however, continued to split his working months between Saudi Arabia and Italy.

Finally, in 2001, his family application for his entry into America was approved and he joined his family and after 11 years of living apart in different countries, the separation between them ended.

He told me that the years of hardship, living without his wife and family, and then living without him had finally paid off! Then quite unexpectedly he looked at me and advised me with these few words: “The only way to make it in a foreign land and living with no family is to be resilient. Work as hard as you can, stay out of trouble and believe in yourself and everything will fall into place.” His greatest pride was in knowing his wife kept the family together in his absence.

I cannot tell you the roller-coaster of emotions I went through as I sat alongside him in that car listening to his story. I thought of the millions of Zimbabweans and Africans living in foreign lands, just like me, with no family, living separate lives, with so many obstacles lying in our way, and suddenly in this Somali man, I found proof of battles won!  

I believe in the hopes that so many of us share. I found strength in this man’s words right in there, in the middle of my own turmoil and as a result I relaxed and fell back on what I always believe in – the ability of a human being to survive and defy the odds!

That spirit of surviving, that strength that lies deep within our bones, that solidifies our African spirit and makes us believe that we will make it - regardless of the situation – makes me proud to be African – and an immigrant.

With the world we come from going through tumultuous times, we still have our inner strength to help us survive. Believe me, we are far from perfect and there are times when we have fallen, and there are times when we want to just give up, but resilience is what makes us wake up everyday and face the world with a smile – that friendly Zimbabwe smile that is famous throughout the world!

I guess that is the thing that separates immigrants from those that survive and those that don’t is a simple belief in knowing you will make it, and we have to let the world know that we are here because we survived.